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89 lines
3.7 KiB
HTML
89 lines
3.7 KiB
HTML
;================================================
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; Kerrek Tracks 1/2 (top or bottom footprints?)
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;================================================
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; (Walk too close to the Kerrek) — {The Kerrek pounds your head into the ground}
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.byte "Your mom always told you not to take head poundings from strange Kerreks. And NOW looks what's happened. You dead. Thanks for playing.",0
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; + shoot Kerrek with bow
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.byte "Here goes nothin', Kid Icarus",0
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.byte "ARROWED!! Nice shot. You smote the Kerrek! He lay there stinking.",0
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.byte "A light rain heralds the washing free of the Kerrek's grip on the land. You're feeling pretty good, though, so the artless symbolism doesn't bug you.",0
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; + get belt
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.byte "You strap the Kerrek's belt buckle around your waist. Oh boy. You sure stink now.",0
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; + look
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.byte "There are large hoof prints in the grass here.",0
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; + look (no Kerrek)
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.byte "There are large hoof prints in the the grass here. And it smells like a public latrine.",0
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; + look (living Kerrek)
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; + look footprints/tracks (living Kerrek)
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.byte "It's the Kerrek, you moron! Get outta here!",0
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; + look footprints/tracks (Kerrek not present)
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.byte "If you weren't a simpleton you might think these were Kerrek prints. But since you are a simpleton, you just go, 'Yay! Piggies!' ",0
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; + look (dead Kerrek)
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.byte "There are large hoof prints in the grass here. There is a large Kerrek-shaped mound on the grass.",0
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; + look (rotting Kerrek)
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.byte "There are large hoof prints in the grass here. Part of the ground looks just like a rotting kerrek.",0
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; + look (skeletal Kerrek)
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.byte "There are large hoof prints in the grass here. Looks like someone left their spare bones here.",0
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; + buy kerrek a cold one (in the Kerrek's domain while he's still alive)
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; (Warning: This speeds the Kerrek up, so be careful.)
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.byte "The kerrek is a teetotaller and is offended by your offer. You've really cheesed him off now.",0
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; + make friends with kerrek
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.byte "Look, it didn't work for Strongbad and it's not gonna work for you either.",0
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; + load / save (while he's still alive)
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.byte "You can't be fumbling with a floppy while the Kerrek is bearing down on you.",0
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; + kill kerrek (he is there, no bow or arrow)
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.byte "With what?! You got no weapons except your butter-knife wit.",0
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; + kill kerrek (he is there, you have arrow but not bow)
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.byte "With what?! You gonna throw that arrow at him?",0
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; + kill kerrek (he is there, you have bow, not arrow
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.byte "With what?! You got no arrow, fool!",0
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; + kill kerrek (he is dead)
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.byte "Yeah. You smote the Kerrek. You deserve a trophy full of Mutton-ums.",0
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; + kill kerrek (he is not there)
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.byte "Good idea. But you kinda need the actual Kerrek to be here for that to work.",0
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; + get arrow (after killing)
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.byte "Eww! No way. That thing's got some serious Kerrek-Brand kooties on it now.",0
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; + get kerrek
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.byte "Well, he does smell real bad. But he's a bit too big to fit in your pocket.",0
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; + look belt (still alive)
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.byte "Yecch. I wouldn't touch that unless it was, like, an important quest item or something.",0
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; + look kerrek (immediately after killing him)
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.byte "He dead. And the only thing of value on him is his stinky belt buckle.",0
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; + look kerrek (immediately after taking the belt)
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.byte "He dead.",0
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; + look kerrek (while he's decomposing)
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.byte "He dead. You didn't think he could have smelled any worse? Well, guess what: He smells worse.",0
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; + look kerrek (when he's all bones)
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.byte "He dead. He wasn't fat, he was just big boned! Poor pig-man.",0
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; + talk kerrek (while he is alive)
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.byte "'Me llamo Julio,' you begin... It seems only to further anger the already tempramental Kerrek. That stupid 'Learn Kerrek in 3 Weeks' cassette did nothing for you!",0
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